Random Solitary Thoughts

Friday, January 24, 2003

Another day brings forth much responsibility on my part. My earthly charge, the unentertaining Kalamari, has once again done the impossible. He has brought boredom to an evolutionary standard, combining both sloth and lethargy together to create an unbroken blend of utter boredomness. Much of which rubs off on me, his unfortunate guardian.

Why oh why must His Almigthy place such a task on me? What have I done to forsaken the Heavens? Have I not done my duties? Have I not praise thee in thy good name? Have I not saved mindless bachelors from rotting in their rooms by placing an occasional cleanliness freak? Was it because my apple pies didn't turn out quite the way they were supposed to? Was it because of the frog I put into your soup last century?

Anyhow, my earthly charge has been most irritable these few days. Thanks to the fact that some idiot screwed up his internet connection in the office, he has been skulking around doing mindless things like work! Besides that, he has been taking his frustrations out on strenuous activities for four nights in a row! I must see Hades about this...

The workload has finally taken a toll on my mortal guardianee. He has succumbed to the pleasures of sleeping during office hours, which resulted in 15 minute naps in the lavatory. This is so wrong. I shall have to punish him by adding maggots to his trash! This, I shall see Loki about.. he's best at what he does. On the brighter side, at least with his compact schedule, my earthly responsibility sleeps more soundly, thus I do not have to ritually look through the archieves to feed his perverted mind with images and suggestions of earthly pleasures... what a sickening task this is! Imagine tons of earthly females flooding one's mind! Putrid, putrid putrid. How can humans love that kind of thing? Now, that Valkyrie on the Eastern side is a different matter...


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